I remember starting with playing cards, then moving back to painting from photographs. I had forgotten what a former professor told me: never draw or paint from photographs. I understood her to encourage the artists mark as much as possible. The camera, though able to capture the truth, leaves out some tell of line and action that the naked eye registers through the hands. Eventually I took to the night sky and I can say that has never ended unto today. Over time, in my journals, I would play at capturing starscapes in watercolor, detail stone circles in black ink, and hammer the moon’s phases in collage. Honestly? Finding images that became iconic in my work took years worth of soul searching and building a reserve of energy to execute on paper. So, I cannot say that it has been easy. If I pick an object or symbol to reside in the work, know that I have wrestled with the desire for months if not years. Selection and inclusion takes inspiration and time. I go not willy-nilly into the night with a six year old’s spelling flash cards full of objects to learn.
Right now, I have to acknowledge that I am starving for new sights and sounds. Heading through the desert to California two years ago helped me bridge twenty chapters in The Raven King. After revisiting my sketches for that car trip, I am bound to finish the novel after reviewing penciled inspiration. Now, let us go back to visual vocabulary and building symbols. With the Tarot, my mind is getting a workout on several levels. Beside the visual word, I am building skills as a storyteller as well. This too is helping my writing; I tend to think in terms of pictures as well as words. The combination of word and picture reads like an eviscerated book sprawling open on the table. I need to review the book “The Medium is the Message”. That book combined with Tarot reading techniques has opened a new world of design and storytelling when making art books and art journals.
What I am looking forward to is a vein of research I never struck before; it is the Christian symbolism inherent in the Major Arcana. I have been pulling off the Internet and ordered two books. I have other books to study to build grounding before I can delve deeper. Making my own deck seems easier now. Especially when making a decision to follow the rules of the traditional game or not. I have a small urge to tackle gaming theory, but right now, that flame is stuck under a bushel.
I had a paper and cardboard suitcase case once that was filled with images I had carefully torn and delicately snipped out of everything paper for six years. I collected images from gazebos to chimpanzees making notations in pencil on the back of each piece noting personal symbolism and greater influences. I miss my former reserve of images terribly. When I lost it I stared at walls for months, there was no way in hell to rebuild it. So, I was back in the dark scrounging around for an anchor and something to build play and discussion. The difference between then and now is my approach anchoring on suggestive texture and translucent layers. Last night’s breakthrough has got me ancy and uncomfortable. I know executing a small series in that order will show growth and patience. I just have to be cautious as to what I push over the feed dogs and catch in the needle. I do not think I will be parting from my singer come any century. For now, I feel split between pushing my understanding of collage, sewing, and mixed media as compared to this nostalgic moment I have summoned earlier in this writing. I see overall treatments in my head, but God knows detail summons an emotive response that becomes verbal. I never bent my practice on positive comments. I never fell out of favor with friend because of sharp criticism. When I am damned is because patrons walk by my work with nothing to say. Then I know I have failed because I have elicited no response. I leave them not even cold, wet, and damp.
I am off to read and am cheerful I do not have to cook tonight. Roommates are a good thing.
As ever, stay hungry and curious.